By Pastor John Brito

Many people feel lonely. It’s not that they have no one around them, it’s that they feel lonely. Loneliness would have a person believe that even though they are surrounded no one knows them and no one cares. So, they face life-struggles feeling alone.

Former surgeon general, Vivec Murthy, published a report in the Harvard Business Review on loneliness in America.

He says that 40% of Americans feel lonely. But his study shows that loneliness is more than just a subjective feeling. The adverse effects of loneliness are on par with smoking 15 cigarettes a day. It is more damaging than obesity, and is associated with a shorter lifespan, cardiovascular disease, dementia, anxiety and depression. The former surgeon general is warning that loneliness is an epidemic that threatens our wellbeing.

Speaking on its prevalence, Murthy says, “During my years caring for patients, the most common pathology I saw was not heart disease or diabetes; it was loneliness.”

So how did we become so lonely? We have shallow relationships and we’re not connecting with others to form relationships that are meaningful.

There is one point that captures the main idea of this post, and it’s this: Loneliness ends when a meaningful relationship with God and others begins.

A meaningful relationship with God:

In this post, I’m going to focus on how cultivating a meaningful relationship with God combats loneliness.

God made us to have a relationship with him. Genesis chapter 2 tells us that God formed the man from the ground, planted a garden and placed him there to cultivate it; and God gave him instructions on what he could eat, and prohibited him from eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Clearly, the man was made to have a relationship with God that encompassed every area of his life.

God’s creation was very good. But there was one thing in creation that wasn’t: God said in Genesis 2:18 that “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” (NLT)

With the creation of the woman, the man now had a relationship with God and with another human being. This shows that we were created to have a meaningful relationship with God and with others, thus, making God the source of all relationships. So, if we get our relationship with God right, we will be on our way to ending loneliness in our life.

Jesus spoke of the relationship that we can have with him in John 14:23, where he says, “All who love me will do what I say. My Father will love them, and we will come and make our home with each of them. (NLT) Loving Jesus and doing his will causes the Father and the Son to make their home in us. This speaks of the presence of God residing in us, as we commune with God the Father and the Son.

We were created to have an intimate relationship with God, and he desires to walk with us in this life. We see this in Matthew 28:20 where Jesus promised that he would always be with us. He said, “And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” (NLT)

God’s role in our loneliness:

So, what is God’s role when we’re feeling alone in our struggle? The Apostle Paul provides a clear example of this. While in prison for Christ, he was abandoned by friends and colleagues as he was brought before a judge to give his defense. This is how he describes that experience in 2 Timothy 4:16-28:

The first time I was brought before the judge, no one came with me. Everyone abandoned me. May it not be counted against them.17 But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength so that I might preach the Good News in its entirety for all the Gentiles to hear. And he rescued me from certain death. 18 Yes, and the Lord will deliver me from every evil attack and will bring me safely into his heavenly Kingdom. All glory to God forever and ever! Amen. (NLT)

When we feel lonely, as if we don’t matter and no one cares about us, we must remember that God is standing with us. He’ll never leave us.

Here’s a prayer that you can make when you feel lonely: “Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. Psalms 25:16 (ESV) God will stand by you.

The most important relationship that we can have is with God. If we get this relationship right, we will begin to chase away loneliness from our life.

Loneliness ends when a meaningful relationship with God and others begins.

What are some things you do to connect with God?